Ask BR: After Breakups I Experience Separation Anxiety, Obsessive Thoughts, & Anger. How Can I Handle Them Better?
Which of your CDs would you recommend for handling breakups better? When a woman ends a romantic relationship I get separation anxiety, depression, obsessive thoughts, and anger. Part of this is connected to feeling unloved and unwanted as a child. I am taking a time out from dating to address these issues.
Also how often do you suggest I listen to each CD to get maximum benefit?
Thank you, Tom
I’m sorry you’re dealing with that kind of pain, and I salute your insightfulness and your decision to take some time out to work on this.
I suggest you try listening to our guided imagery for Heartbreak, Abandonment & Betrayal – it’s created for exactly this, and for your reaction (not uncommon) of anxiety, depression, and ruminating over feeling unlovable. You may want to check out the sound sample on the page to see if it feels like it might be compatible.
How often to listen for maximum benefit? Hard to say, as it’s a pretty individual thing, but generally speaking, listening once or twice a day, ideally when waking up and falling asleep for 2-3 weeks is usually productive, although some people in a lot of distress listen more times a day and for a longer time.
Whenever you feel like you’d like to hear something else, you could have an alternate to go-to. You may want something even more intense, powerful, and psychologically healing, such as Healing Trauma.
Or maybe something a little lighter emotionally, such as Traci Stein’s Self-Compassion Meditations or Bodhipaksa’s Heart’s Wisdom Meditations, great for instilling perspective whether things are going well or going badly.
All of these have sound samples, so you can get a sense of the voice and style. My best wishes with this. It’s good you’re taking time to break the cycle and liberate yourself.