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Grief

  1. How to Handle Grief over the Loss of Health

    How to Handle Grief over the Loss of Health

    Dear BR,

    I'm wondering what the best cds would be for grief around the loss of health that will not be the same again and how this change affects relationships/work/options, etc.

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  2. Guided Imagery Assuages Debilitating Grief

    Guided Imagery Assuages Debilitating Grief

    Dear Health Journeys and BR,

    I am 64 years old. I was married for nearly 4 decades. Two years ago I lost my husband to a long, debilitating illness. Even though his death was expected, I was devastated. I became distraught, I didn't know what to do with myself. Every day was a burden. I became deeply depressed. I just wanted to sleep so I wouldn't feel the pain of the loss of my dear husband and best friend. My daughter became very concerned and made me see a counselor.

    I feel that this wonderful, gentle, wise counselor and the guided imagery for grief that she gave me to listen to each day saved my life. I am not exaggerating. The imagery was a great comfort to me. I actually looked forward to it each evening. It became an oasis of peace, a time I could touch my husband again, through the love I still felt for him and always will feel for him. It was a time when the hurting and loneliness stopped. At first this was only while I was listening, but slowly it spread into other parts of the day. It was and continues to be a blessing and I wanted to say thank you.

    Gratefully,
    Henry's Wife

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  3. Making Peace with Sorrow

    Making Peace with Sorrow

    Along the Road
    by Robert Browning Hamilton

    I walked a mile with Pleasure.
    She chattered all the way.
    But left me none the wiser
    For all she had to say.
    I walked a mile with Sorrow.
    And ne'er a word said she,
    But oh, the things I learned from her
    When Sorrow walked with me!

    Lately, we have been getting an unusually high number of calls from people who are grieving the loss of loved ones or choosing to send audio programs to others who are grieving. I am moved by the heartfelt sincerity in their voices, whether they are lost in grief and seeking something to help them, or bewildered about how to help a grief-stricken friend or relative.

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  4. Isn’t Posttraumatic Stress Very Different from Heartbreak?

    Isn’t Posttraumatic Stress Very Different from Heartbreak?

    We got this thought-provoking question from somebody who'd been browsing our catalog, and objected to the way we had put our guided imagery for heartbreak, abandonment and betrayal under the category for posttraumatic stress...

    Hello -- love your work! Thank you.

    One small quibble. I see that in the catalog your "heartbreak" material is listed under "PTSD".

    I worked the recovery effort at the World Trade Center (well -- I made coffee for the guys who worked in hell and hugged them when they left hell to come to me on hell's fringes) and know a lot of people who have truly seen the worst of the worst. Some of them - unsurprisingly - have PTSD.

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  5. What Can Help the Family Member of a Relative Dying at a Distance?

    What Can Help the Family Member of a Relative Dying at a Distance?

    Hello,

    Do you have any suggestions for guided imagery that could help someone who needs to support a dying family member?

    With the case I have in mind, the person cannot be present, since he is in America and the dying beloved mother in Europe. I am wondering if you would recommend the anxiety CD from Nepasteck (sic)?

    Thanks for your recommendation,

    Dora

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  6. One Man’s Emergence from Grief and Heartbreak

    One Man’s Emergence from Grief and Heartbreak

    We got this really beautiful note last week from a man who'd suffered the terrible loss of his soul-mate and life partner to complications from Non-Hodgkins lymphoma. It's a wonderfully honest and eloquent description of a person's journey through grief and heartbreak to healing and growth - and very inspiring. Here it is:

    "This isn't a question - it's a great big Thank You Note!

    "My soul-mate and life partner, died in May of this year due to complications from chemo and radiation treatments for Non-Hodgkins lymphoma (actual cause of death was end-stage lung disease - not a nice condition).

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  7. Amazing Mom Caregiving a Brain-Injured Son

    We got this exquisite, heroic message a few years ago, in response to my email request for input when I was writing the Caregiver Stress imagery a few years ago.  

    I recently came across it and again marveled at the beauty, wisdom, self-awareness and courage of this rock star of a mother – it’s an essential manual for anyone facing similar, heartbreaking circumstances.  

    She helped me enormously with writing the narrative I eventually recorded, but more importantly, she’s just such a dazzling role model, who offers such excellent advice, even though she’s not trying to give it.

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  8. Is There a Difference vs Posttraumatic Stress and Heartbreak?

    Question:

    Hello -- love your work. Thank you.

    One small quibble: I see that in the catalog your "heartbreak" material got listed under Posttraumatic Stress.

    I worked the recovery effort at the World Trade Center (well -- I made coffee for the guys who worked in hell and hugged them when they left hell to come to me on hell's fringes) and know a lot of people who have truly seen the worst of the worst. Some of them - unsurprisingly - have PTSD.

    It can be tough to get them to deal with it in some cases, and they can be rightfully touchy. One of "my" guys - who truly went through hell thousands of times: he's the bravest man I know - called me in a fury recently.  He'd read an article about a woman claiming she had PTSD because someone pinched her. He felt (and I agreed) that that cheapened his experience (and it's very hard for PTSD sufferers to be taken seriously, as you know).

    I'd move the "Heartbreak" material out of the PTSD section for the same reason. Heartbreak is awful -- I've been there. But PTSD is different and worse.

    Please consider reorganizing that listing. "My" boys would appreciate it.

    Thanks,
    Karen

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  9. Resources to Help with the Sudden, Unexplained Death of a Toddler

    Question:

    I'm looking for the best CD's for some friends who have experienced the loss of a child, Magnolia. She was 22 months old when they found her dead in her crib one morning for no apparent reason - SUCD (Sudden Unexplained Childhood Death).

    This happened a year ago in January 2013. (I'm not sure why I didn't think of something from Health Journeys sooner.  I too lost a child 27 years ago before I knew of Health Journeys)

    They have struggled and do struggle mightily. They are expecting a baby again in late spring and also have another daughter, who is 7.

    I would like suggestions for both the couple and the daughter. They have processed very openly and publicly with a blog, a book donation drive for children through the New York Public Library ($40,000 so far), and services in the Bronx and Denver, CO area, both when Magnolia died and at the one-year anniversary of her loss.

    The pain is still quite raw as they deal with how wrong it is that Magnolia is not with them or in this world, and even that any healing means they are more separated from her.  

    Additionally, we are good friends with Magnolia's grandmother and would love suggestions for her.

    Best, V.

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  10. Addressing Grief, Betrayal, Anger and Forgiveness

    Dear Belleruth,

    I suffered two big traumatic experiences at a very young age.  My father died when I was two, my mother when I was eight.  

    My brother & I went to live with my mom's sister, my aunt & my uncle.  For the most part, it was a good experience, although she was young & having children of her own.  I quickly became the babysitter, maid, nanny, as she worked part time.  

    Jealousy set in as I was in high school and was more involved in sports & school events and a boyfriend.   I married early and have a wonderful marriage and 3 great boys of my own now - the twins are seniors.

    My aunt & uncle divorced about 4 years ago and my aunt wanted me to take her side.  During that time she blew up at me and one of the many harsh things she said to me was that she only raised me because "My mom didn't have enough guts to stick around & raise me herself". 

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